Fears

This week at work, I had an interesting conversation with some of my coworkers. There seems to be a lot of lighthearted humor around the office as a result of one person’s phobia. So, it made me think of some of my irrational fears.

I inquired of my coworkers what some of there strange phobias were.

 Truth time – my strange irrational fear is Aliens…I know, I know. It stems from a childhood traumatic event on a Walt Disney World ride that I was to young to go on (my dad warned me…) it’s irrational and crazy and its one of the reasons why my husband has to go watch Star Wars without me, but there you go; I am putting it out there.

This week Daniel is having reoccurring nightmares. He has the same or similar dreams and he just can’t sleep. I am not sure what’s causing them recently and I am sure many of you parents can share my frustration with a child not sleeping. But this pain that he has though, I can understand. Because I also have had reoccurring nightmares.

For over a year I haven’t been able to sleep well and have the same nightmare over and over, (and its not about aliens – its way more rational than that).Truthfully, it’s exhausting and terrifying and I know the cause is stress and anxiety related to Daniel’s illness.

But let’s unpack that for a minute…so often as parents when our children are experiencing something, or have experienced something, it’s our job to put on a brave face! To be the rock—to tell them its going to be ok, that no matter what happens they aren’t alone—when the truth is that we are often just as afraid and worried as they are. (sometimes more!) Yet, some how they believe us. They take comfort in us. They find rest in being near us. This is one area of my life that I have had to really rely on my faith.

As much as I—as a mom—want to take Daniel’s nightmares away and snuggle him close and tell him, “you don’t have to be afraid, just come close to me, I got you,”

Sometimes, fear and anxiety almost sound like “bad” words, like we are afraid to admit that we have them. But the truth is we all at some point or another experience it. What we need is to speak it honestly, to not be ashamed of our fears, but to let ourselves find that place where we can feel safe and to admit that sometimes we are afraid, and find comfort in knowing that someone else cares. So, out of curiosity, what are your fears? Irrational or otherwise?

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